Bachelor Recap!!!

I found a website that I was able to watch the Bachelor on last night instead of waiting til tonight to watch it on Hulu and have to avoid all forms of social media until I could.  So I am glad to be on the same page as everyone else this morning.  I just want to share with you the thoughts I voiced to Landon while I watched the show:

1.She has the crazy eyes
2.Teach him yoga the first time you met? You might as well have gotten out of the limo naked. Slut.
3.Fifty Shades of CRAY!! look at his face, he’s terrified
4.Annnnd she didn’t stick the landing…. That was awkward.
5.Oh Honey spit out the gum
6.I’d probably kiss her. And so would he. giving her a rose. What a hunk.
7.Those girls are gonna freak out. They’re freaking out….
8.Nothing says awkward like forcing an awkward moment on someone.
9.She has Ke$ha hair.
10.She talks like Kourtney Kardashian. Wait is she the girl with only one arm?  Now I feel bad.
11.Diana! I’m totally Facebook friends with her. I don’t know her, but she added me so I like her already.
12.Is that Nicole Richie?
13."I'm gonna pee my pants." Is it bad if I genuinely hope she does.
14.Whoever introduces herself as Barbie is automatically a hoe.
15.No no NO!! A wedding dress. And she kissed him on the lips….and she told him she has balls.
16.Oooooh!!! I remember Kacie B. I liked her! The girls are all gonna freak out again.  They’re freaking out.
17.My Money is on the poker dealer snapping first.
18.Don’t say she had her chance with Ben. Ben sucked. Royally.
19.Annnd Selma is drunk.
20.Fifty Shades of Cray has no Business judging the girl in the wedding dress. I do, though.
21.Would it be politically incorrect to not give the one armed girl a rose?  I would just feel bad.
22.Pahahah Barbie didn’t get a rose. Hoe.
23.Now the girl in the wedding dress is feeling some buyer's remorse.
24.She should ditch the wedding bit…. Be normal be normal!! Be sober... be sober...
25.He doesn’t get her Jokes. And you didn’t get his rose. This is uncomfortable.
26.Fifty Shades of Cray is about to rape him. Run Sean, RUN!
28.Everybody hates Kacie. Even I kind of hate Kacie.
29.Every sneak peek of the next episode has a shot of the Bachelor leaning over a balcony looking very melancholy at the rose. Never fails.
30.Fifty Shades of Cray just called herself Barbie. Hoe.

on my favorite morning show I listen to every morning, they are always dogging on Sean.  They think he is going to be boring.  But I say who cares if we are looking at this for two hours every Monday night.
Yeah... that's not boring.

At the end of the episode my favorite girl was the one with one arm.  She just had a little more substance to her. Plus she was hot.  If she had two arms, none of the other girls would stand a chance.


  1. I somehow ending up watching this crap-storm last night. I usually only watch the Bachelorette. All of the crying women. ALL OF THEM. This show is going to be the death of me.

    Tarryn.. WHY WAS SHE CRYING!?!?!?!??!?!??!!??!?!??!? Why were all of the stupid girls crying?!?!??!?!?!?!? waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh... we spent 15 minutes together and now it's over.. how will I go on....

    bet your life I'll watch it next week.

  2. I need to start doing this. I feel like I probably annoy people with my tweet comments. haha. No one is really standing out to me as "Oh my heck I love her!" yet... I do love miss Kacie B. though. And there are so many crazies it's going to be entertaining.

  3. I haven't watched it yet because I am out of town (thank goodness for my DVR), and this makes me want to watch it even more now! Plus, Sean is smokin hot- who wouldn't want to watch that goodness? Mmm loll

  4. I am hoping he or a look a like becomes my pool boy this summer.

  5. i can't even get over how we thought the exact same things! Great minds think alike!! this recap is awesome!

  6. I do not watch...but WHAT COLOR IS HE?!? He is all one color. Hair, skin, eyebrows. Almost as horrifying as mice.


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