i hate blogging from anything except a computer

So listen. Landon's MacBook is getting fixed right now. And with it, went his charger. And my charger got lost in the move so I've been blogging from my kindle all week because my laptop has been dead since Monday. And I hate it. So....this is a quickie post to say have a great weekend and to go tell Shay happy birthday. That's right. She and Alissa are practically born on the same day. Except they're not. But almost.

33 days people.


At work yesterday, I watched these horrible clouds tumbling over the mountains. Deep shades of blue and purple and black. Like someone gave the sky a black eye.  And sure enough, on my drive home I got snowed on. Twice.  When Landon got home, he found me bundled up in every kind of sweater clothing I had and my toes were still popsicles. Even though September around these parts is usually still pool weather, we decided the early winter signs deemed it fit to start a fire in the wood burning stove.

Everyone was ok with it.

It was a cozy night to say the least.  The commute back to work was another story.

On a totally separate note, today is one of my best friend's birthday.  Miss Alissa Erin is partying hard today. Or at least getting ready to party hard considering it's still business hours right now...even in NY... Stop on over and tell here Happy Birthday if you feel like it.  I'll be stopping by in exactly 34 days. IRL.  Still trying to fully grasp that one. CAN'T WAIT!!

First World Problems

So, I'm recovering from possibly the most disappointing weekend of my life.  And it's embarrassing to even talk about because it's not anything life changing or anything.  All that happened is that Landon stood in line for hours to get me the new iPhone and he wasn't able to get me one.  BUT- he was able to get one for himself.  And so now I just hold it and pretend it's mine.  And THEN, BYU lost to Utah for the 4th year in a row.  And it's just- it's painful.

On the plus side though, I was finally able to purchase my flight to New York.  Where the best week of my life will take place with Shay, Alissa and Kelsey.  Getting that taken care of got me so pumped.  And the countdown is 36 days.

Here are a few pics taken off the new iPhone.  The quality blows my sad little phone out of the water.  So Landon has come to terms that I will commandeer his phone whenever I need to take a pic for the next three weeks.

Still don't want to talk about it.

Day 14: Death to Blogtember

WHEW!  Although we are only 19 days into September, Blogtember is officially dead to me.  I don't know why, but I was just dreading every new prompt.  I'd sit down every night and put the very least amount of effort into each post as possible. So here we are again.  Relying solely on my natural wit to get us through another morning.

But- there isn't a whole lot of that running through my system right now.  Because I used ALL MY ENGERY yesterday (and battery life) trying to update my iPhone to the new iOS 7.  I LITERALLY started at 11:03 am- three minutes after it became available to the public and EXTREMELY long story short, it didn't finalize until 7:31 pm.  And even though I'm refusing to go into any details (for fear that you will lose massive amounts of respect for me due to how OBSESSED I was about getting it) just know that I am emotionally drained.  And also know, that it was well worth it.  I LOVE the new design.  AND- in nearly 24 hours a new 32 gb GOLD iPhone 5s will be in my possession.  Or at least Landon's.  He is in charge of obtaining one for me AT (clap) ALL (clap) COSTS (clap).

Oh and good news.  After six weeks of unemployment, Landshark has a job again.
Which means I don't have to feel bad about dropping ungodly amounts of cash on my new phone even though I've been saving for it since March.

suck on that Blogtember.

Day 13: Only Photos

Wednesday, September 18: Only photos

This is a peek into where I live now.  And the things that make me happy here. 

**side note, Blogtember is coming to a close as of today. I'll be back to my regular posting tomorrow.

Day 11: A Memory You'd Love to Relive

Tuesday, September 17: A memory you would love to relive.

ok, lesbehonest, I've kinda been giving the bare minimum effort on these last few posts, but today's topic took me back.  I was going through photos on FB (because how else can I reminisce?) when I broke into our Hawaii photos.  I would freaking LOVE to go back to Kauai. Like with all my heart I would love it. I miss those sunsets out my window, I miss the mountains and the locals and the scenery that usually included Landon's face.  And those fish n' chips? How could I forget. I want to go back. 

so so so soooo bad.

I left a part of me there.  I think it's necessary that I go back to visit her from time to time.

Day 10: A Love Letter

Monday, September 16: Write a public love letter to someone in your life. (It doesn't necessarily need to be romantic.)

So, I was going to try to get creative with this love letter.  One that wasn't necessarily romantic, but as I sat here at my computer I couldn't find a way to not start a letter to the love of my life. So here it goes...

Dear Landon,
You're sexy as hell.
love, Whitney.

Nightmare on 13th

This whole Blogtember thing makes it hard for me to blog about other things that are going on in my life.  And I don't really do the whole blog on weekends thing, but we had a great one the last couple days.  Friday night we hit up Nightmare on 13th with our buddies.  We've gone every year I've been with Landon.  It wasn't as scary this year.  I don't know if it was because it was opening night and they were still trying to get the feel of things... But usually I'm hiding behind Landon with my eyes shut tight  and my face buried in his shirt, this time however, I walked freely by his side. Yeah, I jumped at a few things, but I wasn't really afraid.  It was still fun, though.

We hit up this little hole in the wall restaurant called Mo's Diner after.  It was delicious and dirt cheap.  Probably because it's in the heart of the shady side of SLC.  Regardless, we left satisfied despite having to dodge psycho bicyclists outside.

We went for a swim this evening, and even though the pool is maintaining a delicious 87 degrees, it is clear the fall temps are making their way through the mountains.  Autumn is nearly upon us to soothe the burn left by this ridiculous summer.  And I can't be excited enough.

Day 9: A Selfie

Friday, September 13: A self portrait

What you see is what you get, biotches.
Have a sassy Friday.

Day 8: What's in it For Me?

Thursday, September 12: Discuss ways that blogging or social media has changed you.

Pff.  What hasn't it done for me?  I think the biggest thing blogging and social media has done for me was bring people into my life that I desperately needed.  I've made friends that know the nooks and crannies of my life that I've never been able to talk about to anyone else.  When Landon and I got married, I didn't anticipate the lack of communication I would have with all my friends.  People said you'd fall off the earth after you got married, so enjoy your friends while they were there.  And I really felt like I tried to do that.  But there are still lonely nights where I miss having constant friends who I could talk to any time of day or night.  When I started blogging, I got that again.  Because these friends most of the time are only reachable by cell phone or internet.  And I don't know, it's like they are always with me.  Tucked into my emails and text messages.  

Does that make sense?  I

 never feel alone because I always have a friend just a tweet away.  

Day 7: Online Shopping

Wednesday, September 11: Share links to your favorite online shops, preferably with a few photos of your favorite items in each shop.

ok, ummmm this is awkward.  Because listen, I don't actually online shop all that much.  Unless it's for something that I need that isn't usually clothes and Amazon Prime can have it shipped in two days.  In my bored Amazon browsing, I have found some put-retty weird things. And instead of showing you my favorite coral pants and mint green shirt combo with bubble necklace, I'm going to uncover the weird side of online shopping.  Don't be anticipating any fashionista discoveries here...
1. Wolf Urine
From the brief description it is to paint the illusion that predators are in the area and is great for "photographers, gardeners, hunters and wildlife enthusiasts."  But due to shipping regulations, it cannot be shipped to California anymore, sorry Tiff.

While this one boasts a great gift for adults, in the comments section a consumer advises against giving it to children because, "Aside from harmless images of guns, the book does contain some adult language, and Brotha Lynch Hung looks like he might be frightening to a two-year-old."

Like, apparently this thing totally yodels.  And it's like, "Why didn't I get this a long time ago after all this time I've wasted trying to teach my pickles how to yodel?"  Amazon had it the whole time.  A satisfied customer had this to say, "My twelve year-old niece asked for the Justin Bieber CD for Christmas, so I bought her this yodeling pickle. Nobody so far can tell the difference." Score.

So, out of the "weird things" section on Amazon, I find this one to be the most useful so far.  Because I've always thought that about bars of soap in the shower.  I personally just stick with body wash and face wash so I don't have to deal with the problem of washing my face with butt soap.  Just a warning from another customer, "I noticed that there is, at the time of writing this review, one "used" butt face soap available for sale. Thank you kind sir, or madam, but I'll pass on your used butt face soap."

While this is a nice thought, it doesn't sound promising.  Especially in the description where it says:
  • No Batteries Required - Powered By Positive Thinking
  • Exert Absolute Control Over Subject
  • Point At Subject: Press Button: Hope For Best

I guess if you get to that point of desperation where hope is all you have left, then maybe this is for you.

Annnd there you have it.  I found that Amazon is a lot like youtube in the sense that there are these dark corners where the weirdoes hang out.  And sometimes you cross over on accident and have a hard time finding your way back. 

Day 6: Life-Changer

Tuesday, September 10: Describe a distinct moment when your life took a turn.

Alright. Stay with me on this. In 2006, I was a Jr. in High School.  I was in our show choir and after our December full of dozens of performances, our teacher from Hell gave us a "Sluff Day."  AKA we didn't have to go to class.  I didn't have any really close friends in choir that year because UMMM choir kids sucked at life.  So I had this free period with nothing to do, so this girl I kinda knew- she was in my English class too and stuff, we had talked a few times- she and I were like, well.... do you want to go to lunch together?  And that was the day that begun a best friendship between Kayleigh and me.

This was on the California trip our choir took every year.

Ok, so that is the first part.  That is where the initial turn began.  The "blinker" if you will.  Junior year came and went, so did summer and the first half of our Senior year.  And the time to start applying to college arrived.  I was accepted and awarded scholarships to two different universities.  One an hour North from  home and one an hour South.  I wasn't sure which one I was going to take until Kayleigh got accepted to BYU which is one town over from UVU (the school South of home).  So that was essentially why I made the decision to move to Orem for school.

Still following? Ok, so like the week before I moved out, I sort of had a freak out that I was moving in with a bunch of strangers.  I had heard horror stories about roommates and I was like, "What am I doing!?"  I knew a girl with lived in the complex I was moving to, so I called the office up to see if there was room in her apartment and if I could be in it.  The secretary was like, "There isn't any room, but I can move you to the other side of the complex so you are in her same church ward."  And I decided that would be ok.  I felt better about it.  If I hadn't done that, I would have never moved in with my three best hooligans.

These hooligans and I were inseparable until I got married.  So when I got a job at the apartment complex as secretary, hooligan one wanted me to use my power to get us an apartment on the other side of the complex for the summer to see if we liked it better.  So we all packed up our crap and moved from Building I to Building E for a few months.  And then due to my boss being a DOUCHE I was fired for uncalled for reasons.  I was heart broken. And on top of all that, Building E sucked big time and we missed living on the other side next to the volleyball court.  

So when fall was approaching we requested to be moved back to the area from where we originally lived.  To our dismay, Building I was full, but there was a vacancy in Building J.  So we took it.  If I had the job at the office though, I would have never put us there because there were no neighbors across the hall and I would have made a more social environment for us.  But we realized at this point beggars couldn't be choosers and to Building J we moved.

Fall semester had almost come and gone, and we still didn't have neighbors across the hall to entertain us.  I did still have my master key from when I worked there so we could borrow the vacant apartment's fridge, and mattresses and couches when we accidentally broke ours...  But one day, I was about to leave for work when I heard a group of people outside my door.  I heard keys jangle and the door open and close- and I knew that the apartment was being shown.  I was way too excited and I ran out my door and into theirs and these three boys were standing there with the girl who took my job, all of them a little stunned to see me burst in.  I asked, "Are you guys going to be my new neighbors?"  with high hopes especially because the one sitting at the kitchen counter was a total babe. (You get I'm talking about Landon right?)  And they were like, "Ummmm, maybe...." Looking back now, I can't believe they didn't run away and never look back.  But, they did move in.  And our apartments had so much fun together.  We went on many adventures.

one of them is still going pretty strong....

And there you have it.  If I hadn't gone to lunch with Kayleigh that day, I would have never moved to UVU where I would move in and around with my hoolis, get fired and relocated to a place where I would have never chosen and if I hadn't been in that exact spot at that time I would have never met the love of my life.  How's that for a game changer, huh? 

whew.... I'm tired.

Day 5: Personality

Monday, September 9: Take this short personality test and respond to your results. (at the end, find the detailed profile of your personality account - click "click to view" under "You" and "self awareness and personal growth." You can even google your type and find more info on it!)

ok, so I went to the website directed from this prompt.  Which- btw is not a "short" quiz. *cough* 72 questions *cough* And I took the personality quiz.  They were pretty basic questions, nothing too deep or revealing and these are the results it gave me.

Now, this little break down sounds basically like hitting the nail on the head.  I was all, "Yeah, that totally sounds like me."  But then I went to the part where it was like, "You" and "Self-Awareness" and whatnot and it dove deeper into it and it started to sound less and less like me.  So I dunno.  I saw a lot of similarities and just as many differences, but when I decided the results were off was at the end when it compared me to Monica from Friends.  I love Friends.  If you go here you will remember that show made it to my top five.  But Monica was my LEAST favorite.  Sure, I thought she was funny, but I hardly identified with her in all ten seasons.  So. I came to the conclusion that the surface results of this test were pretty solid.  But the deeper the results went, the less accurate it was becoming.

annnd if anyone, I'd say I'm like Phoebe.

Day 4: At First I Was Afraid- I Was Petrified

Friday, September 6: A story about a time you were very afraid.

Um, ok.  This might be a little hard for me to talk about or even articulate because I'm still a little shook up over it.  Because- it happened last night.  But- I will do my best for you, my dear readers.

Back story:  There is a restaurant here in Heber called Dairy Keen.  They are famous for their shakes.  I usually stuck to my usual cookie dough shake, because I know I love it and I don't like taking risks when it comes to food.  But, a couple months ago, we went and there was a sign on the board that said, 

"Try our NEW Banana NUTELLA shake!"

And I was all, "I like ALL those words."  So I obeyed the sign and ordered up.  Lo and behold my taste buds were sent on a roller coaster of emotions.  First, disbelief.  This shake- it was a lie. It had to be. Then, ecstasy.  High as a kite, my taste buds and I flew.  We had found Nirvana.  And then, incomplete.  When I realized my life would never be lived fully when I didn't have a banana Nutella shake in my hand.  

So the other day I was trying to describe to a co-worker the sheer bliss that is the BanaNutella when it hit me.  PINTEREST!  I didn't have to always been within a five mile radius of D.K. if I could find a copy cat recipe...  Nervously, my shaking fingers typed in "banana nutella shake" into the search bar and two seconds later, my screen was flooded with different recipes, pictures bragging "the BEST" and "#heaven."  I browsed them, looking for what I thought would be the most accurate.  Most were too complex.  This was a simple shake.  A perfect blend of two God Blessed ingredients. I was losing hope when suddenly- I found it.  The simplicity I was looking for.  The clouds parted and angels descended down sunbeams and kissed me gently on each cheek. I committed the recipe to memory and stopped by the grocery store on my way home not even grabbing a basket, but carrying the goods in my arms.

Now, I'm sure you're wondering, "When are you getting to the part when you were afraid?"  The answer is right.....nnnow.  After dinner when everyone had excused themselves from the kitchen and left me behind with the dishes soaking in the sink, I opened the freezer and pulled out the ice-cream.  I retrieved my un-opened jar of Nutella from behind the Saltines and Tostinos.  The bananas were on the counter- untouched because they were on the more ripe side.  I slowly dished out the proper amounts of each and blended to perfection.  Not too chunky, I wanted shake consistency, but not pureed either, with small bits of banana to add substance as well as flavor.  I poured it into my glass and beheld the it in all it's beauty.

I had only taken a second to take a photo and let the Nectar of the God's touch my lips for but a moment. I closed my eyes and sighed for I had found the Holy Grail of copy cat recipes.  And whilst my eyes were closed, the work of the Devil took place.  What witch craft, I cannot explain, but when I opened my eyes my heart broke.  

 What venomous, conniving demon partook of my firmament without my consent?  I was alone; unarmed. What would I do to protect myself from the malignant spirit that lingered in my Mother In-Law's kitchen?  I stood with my back against the pantry door, and slowly slid down clutching my empty glass like a fallen friend.  And would I be next?

The answer is no.  I was fine.  

Minus a radical sugar rush that inspired this outlandish post.
I know you want the recipe, right? k.  The original recipe is from HERE, but I'll save you the trouble of navigating.

5 (smallish) scoops of vanilla ice-cream
1/2 cup of milk
3 T of Nutella
1 browning banana

Day 3: Advice

Day 3 of Blogtember requests: Pass on some useful advice or information you learned and always remembered. 

I feel like I always give the same advice every time with this sort of prompt.  Let it go. Let it go let it go LET IT THE EFF GO!!  So this time around, I'm going to change it up and give you the second most important advice I've come to learn in this life of mine.

I'm serious with this one.  And I'll expound upon it.  Do not, under any circumstances purposefully tell someone about a fear you have.  Such as: I'm DEATHLY TERRIFIED of ANY bug/spider/bee/caterpillar/grasshopper/earthworm.  And I'm violating my own rule right now by throwing that out there.  But it's because pretty much the whole world knows anyway.  But it's like, the second someone finds out I'm afraid of bugs, they will find one and shove it right in my face.

And when I say "never trust anyone" I'm talking: Mom, Dad, Brother, Sister, Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Husband (emphasis on that one), BFF, Co-worker, Boss, Mailman, Bus driver, Paper boy, Butcher, Grave digger or even God.  NONE OF THEM CAN BE TRUSTED.

There. Take that and grow, my child.

Day 2: Where Would I Go?

Day 2 of Blogtember poses the question of: If you could take three months off from your current life and do anything in the world, what would you do?

This may sound like a cop out, but I don't really know where.  I'm not one who plans extravagant vacations, though I will be first in line to sign up for one that is planned and paid for.  But if I suddenly got the opportunity to up and leave no questions asked for three months, I'd imagine it would be someplace like this:
But what I would do for three months is another part of this for me.  I would leave everything behind. EV-ER-Y-THING.  Except a camera and of course maybe Landon.  And I would spend three months taking pictures and writing and breathing.  Watching sunrises and sunsets every day.  Because the sky: it dazzles me. I've told all my secrets to the sky.  And to be in a place where there are no mountains blocking it? No sky scrapers, no telephone poles, trees, cranes, or houses.  Only a fine line between water and space. A tight rope to be walked every Morning Rise and Nightfall.  That is where I'd like to hang my hat for three months.  

Day 1: Where I Come From

Alright peeps, here we go again, it is time for another blog challenge, this month being: Blogtember!

The topic for today is: 

Tuesday, Sept. 3: Describe where or what you come from. The people, the places, and/or the factors that make up who you are.

Talk about easy topic.  *ahem*  I come from Layton Utah.  It is vital that you DO NOT pronounce the "t" in Layton.  It's the number one way to tell you're a foreigner.  My parents are Tim and Tracie, which one I take after most is a tough decision to make.  In fact, I don't think there is an actual answer to that; we are all basically one person.  My brother Brenden and my sister Mariah are just the same.  Prepare for a personality overload if you ever find yourself hanging out with us.  It's a lot to handle the first time.

Layton is up on a bench, only about 10 miles from the Great Salt Lake.  Due to the lake effect Mother Nature was far more generous with the snow than in most of the rest of the valleys.  The snowbanks were generally always over my head.  Until I hit a growth spurt in 8th grade anyway...  But due to snow being a major part of my life I was hitting the slopes very early in life.  The first 17 years of my life I was a skier.  I kind of hit a plateau around age twelve.  I stuck with it, but I didn't love it as much, but then Landon came along and taught me to board which completely refueled my fire.

Also, most of my life we had our boat.  Making the water as big, if not bigger part of my life as snow.  Tubing, knee-boarding, wake boarding, fishing you name it.  Sun-loving skin is a dominant trait as is the ability to swim.  Water Dog was a well-deserved nick name early in life.

Then came camping.  We tent camped basically my whole life, but around the age of 11, we got a motor home and four wheelers and dirt bikes, and camping spring, summer and fall was a must.  Every holiday weekend, every school break, every chance  we got we found ourselves trucking it up to the mountains or paddling our way out to the sand dunes.  I graduated from four wheelers to my XR 200 and never looked back.  And my ability to ride dirt bikes is what attracted Landon to me in the first place.  So, score.

Utah has a lot to offer as far as outdoor adventures go.  And growing up in this environment, one where people travel from ALL OVER the world, has definitely shaped me into who I am.  I guess the best way to describe it would be "outdoorsy."  

But don't you think for a second that I like hiking. because I don't.
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